Before I became a Money Coach, I went through my own Money Coaching process. It was an experience that changed my life! During this coaching journey, one of the Archetypes that showed up very prominently for me was the Martyr.
I grew up with a very powerful scarcity mentality always feeling I never had enough. A strong subconscious story ran in my mind that I was not worthy or deserving of, well, pretty much anything to be honest!
(I go into more detail about this in my bio on my website)
My Martyr Runs Deep!
When I learnt about the Martyr and its characteristics, it became so obvious to me how and where this particular archetype plays out in my life – it’s pretty much everywhere!
What I saw clearly was that the martyr runs deep in me. It pulls my subconscious strings and shows up in my life in multiple ways. You see, our strongest money behaviours are deeply embedded and can impact our lives in ways we don’t even notice until we really take the time to examine what is going on.
It’s this deep level work that I love doing the most with my clients. We journey inwards to find the links and join the dots to create a picture of their behavioural patterns. Then together we build an understanding of their money story and change their unhelpful behaviours. It’s pure magic and a process that changes their lives.
Money is Energy
In reality, money is energy and holds up a mirror from the past that reflects on what is happening in our present. Our money relationship touches everything we do, showing its true colours through our unconscious behaviours.
For instance, I have always bought clothes and gifts for my husband and children. I have done this to the extent that my husband’s wardrobe now overflows with an excess of everything – half the stuff he doesn’t even know he has! Yet my own wardrobe is half empty because I just don’t buy for myself.
The Power of Insight
Understanding our relationship with money is an ongoing journey. Just recently I had once such experience.
I had a sudden memory of my mother telling me, “Ilana you don’t deserve this!” The memory was so vivid I could actually hear her voice clearly saying the words, “You don’t deserve this!” It shocked me with its power and explained the exact reason why I go without and treat myself to nothing. It was key link to my Martyr archetype behaviour.
After this insight I asked my son if he recalled me ever saying those words to him. I was so worried that I was repeating this behaviour with my own children, but thankfully he said no. When I asked my daughter the same question she said, “No, but I have heard Granny saying it to you!”
It’s so important to be aware of our thoughts and our behaviours, and mindful of what is worth repeating and what is not. Our repeated thoughts become our repeated actions and create our experience of the world we live in. Be aware of this in your own life and how this can impact the lives of those around you. .
All the time and effort I have put in to understanding myself, and the work I have done to weed out my unconscious money patterns and behaviours, has helped me on a deeper level to be the person I am meant to be: someone who I finally believe is deserving of all things good.
When you’re ready to truly know yourself, and have all the things you really deserve, take my Money Quiz and then let’s jump on a call and have a chat. Your life of purpose and abundance is waiting right now to be created.